And Adam said, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of man.”

Genesis 2:23

A woman reflects the man from which she was taken out of and she was created to fulfill a need in the man. A man needs a helper that could meet his needs and as a woman you are a help-meet, a help (suited) to your man’s needs. Eve’s body, soul, and spirit were created to be a blessing and help to Adam, just as yours is to your man. As a woman, you are not in that marriage, or about to enter into it to compete with that man. You are simply in it to complete and complement him. You are the help he needs in the fulfilment of his purpose and destiny.

Understanding this simple truth and knowing your place as a woman will save you so much stress and hurt in marriage. This is because this understanding will define your actions and determine your reactions to him and to the events unfolding in your marriage. Wisdom, the Bible says is the principal thing, and in all your getting, get understanding. Proverbs 24:3-4 says "through wisdom is a house builded; and by understanding it is established: And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches". Life and marriage in particular isn’t complicated at all, there are just a few principles God put in place to guide us through life and choices, making the whole process smooth. Your life and marriage can be filled with so much precious and pleasant riches if you simply seek knowledge, get understanding and be wise. Don’t just watch movies and read novels filled with fairytales, wasting away time which is also equal to life. Get Knowledge and seek understanding!

Understand this: You complete your man! You were created to help him fulfill purpose. Don’t hurt him, don’t make life miserable for him, don’t try to compete with him, and don’t try proving your own points with him. What you need is to know that he really loves you even as the scriptures has declared that ‘husband love your wives’. It is easy to love a lovely person and this is why your goal as a woman should be to become a lovely help-meet and not a troublesome help-meet; and to be a good one takes a lot of effort. Don’t make life hell for your husband, if you do, you aren’t fulfilling the purpose with which God created you for him. Even if your husband does not love, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t too and act accordingly to him. Love him despite and in spite it all. It is difficult to push aside love; even the toughest person understands and is drawn to a heart of love.  Everyman gets inspired at gracious words. Work on yourself to be the best help suited for your husband, this takes a whole lot of effort; but that is why you married him.

Many at times, you see men doing great and awesomely in life, I appreciate the man but much more I give kudos to the wife because behind him.  She is there doing her job as the help suited and making sure he is where he is today by all means (we will look into all she does to ensure this later). This is who a help meet is. You help your husband get to that place of destiny; even if you are not recognized by people and appreciated. Your reward is here and God sees it all because you are fulfilling purpose.

1 Corinthians 11:8-9"for the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man".

We are created for them, this is the simple truth many of us need to accept andthis is the reason a part of our thoughts are wrapped up thinking about certain men and the hopes of marriage. We are wired that way with the overwhelming need to be a wife and a mother, to be caring, loving and supportive. You can agree with me that it’s just easy for us to be this way. Even for women that want to be tough, there is a part of them that is just soft and sensitive to the needs around them. I think a very simple question to ask ourselves often is “am I living in such a way as the word of God describe that I live? Have I been a good helper for the man or would I be a good helper to him, would I be capable of supplying his needs, filling the emptiness of his heart and serving him in a way to make him successful in all he chooses to do? “And if you are married ask yourself if you have been doing all this. This is fulfillment of purpose for you as a woman. Your purpose is intertwined with helping your husband. Whatever God has created you for and the abilities and skill you possess are all for this purpose, you may not realize it now but they are.

I will use Rebecca as an example; she was skilled at what she does and that was what attracted her husband to her through the servant sent by Abraham (Genesis 24:15-20). She was ready to help the course of her man. She was skilled for it already.

Ruth was also very hardworking, working in the field of the man that ended up being her husband, Boaz. (Ruth 2). She exhibited so much skill at what she does, which also complemented her husband.

Studying the life of Esther, you will know that she had being groomed to be a queen, it didn’t just start at the palace; all along she had been trained for it. Little wonder amongst several women, she was picked. This is because she is the one to help the king with his purpose at that time and this was attached to delivering her people afterwards.

Even Mary the mother of Jesus, she helped carry the course of the birth of the Savior. She fit properly into the life of Joseph as the Savior was to come from his lineage. She helped in the fulfillment of that purpose as predestined by God and she did this successfully.

We will see from all these examples that these women all groomed themselves ready and fit into the purpose of these men. Their skills, abilities, gifting were aligned with this. There are many more examples even in our contemporary days; you all know them around you. Women who do not consider themselves, but the purpose with which they were created and help their men out. They refuse to be competitors with their husbands, raising shoulders with them, but are submissive even to the end.

Sarah is our perfect example, Isaiah 51: 2 says "Look unto Abraham your father, and unto Sarah that bare you". Whose daughter are you? Sarah was submissive to the end. 1 Peter 3: 5-6 says "for after this manner the old time the holy women also. Who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement".

Ephesians 5: 23 says "for the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the Church and he is the savior of the body". Your husband is your head in all ramifications - spiritually, emotionally and physically. This is where your safety lies. The position of submission is where you as a wife will find real fulfillment as a woman. God calls women help-meet, He never called a man to be a help meet to his wife. He commanded wives to submit to, obey and reverence their husband, not the other way round.

Every woman is a wife first and every other thing second. If you don’t follow God’s plan for a woman, things won’t work right for you and you might struggle and success might not be totally achieved. Irrespective of whom a man is and his personality traits; a good woman will bring out the MAN in him. Through Wisdom is a house built.

Thank you for reading.